All pastors are eager for assistance in serving the married couples under their charge. In virtually every case, the health of a church is directly connected to the health of the families in that church.
Transforming Church’s Jim Osterhaus has years under his belt as both a marriage therapist and executive and pastoral coach. The author of several best-selling books on marriage, his recent book Questions Couples Ask Behind Closed Doors is essential reading for any pastor who deals with married couples (in other words, every pastor!) not to mention any pastor who is married. Below is an excerpt and a link to get your own copy.
The questions that continually recur in my counseling practice are questions about unspoken expectations, unexpressed needs, guilt and forgiveness, intimacy and sex, communication and conflict, in laws, resentments, resurfacing old issues, decision-making, children, step-children, and personality differences. Often, one partner will share those questions and feelings and the other partner will look up in surprise and say “I never knew you felt that way!”. And real communication begins – sometimes for the first time in years.
Obviously, no book can take the place of a therapy session with a trained marriage and family counselor. But in this book I have tried to gather the most common and troubling questions I encounter in my own counseling practice – questions that reveal the hidden dynamics of a relationship and lead to a major breakthrough in communication and understanding. I have also collected the principles and insights that have produced healing and transformation in so many couples who have crossed the threshold of my office.
As we explore these insights together, the answer to the big question – “What is a healthy marriage supposed to look like?” – will come into focus. This book is designed to give you the hands-on tools and communication strategies so that you and your partner can experience a rich and rewarding relationship”.
Hopefully, this creates an appetite for more! You can get Jim’s book here and continue your journey to serving the married people in your own church – and maybe even yourself!
Excerpt from Questions Couples Ask Behind Closed Doors by James Osterhaus (2014, Familius).
Photo cred: amazon.com